Making this time of Singleness Something Positive

friendships, Guest Post, singleness

Making Singleness Something Positive

Is it just me, or is the introduction paragraph kind of awkward no matter how you phrase it? It seems like there are only so many ways to introduce yourself, and I’m going to stick with the most basic one: I’m Juliette and normally I’m over at The Other Juliette using GIF after GIF after GIF in posts about friends, bad dates, or general singleness. I’ve known Brittany ever since I religiously started stalking her blog 3 1/2 years ago when I accidentally typed her URL into the box instead of my own (hers had the word “three” and mine had the number “3”) which is obviously FATE because what are the chances?? Brittany and I finally made the leap from blog friends to twitter friends to facebook friends and then WE EXCHANGED PHONE NUMBERS and she doesn’t get mad when I blow up her phone at night with my boy stories. Thanks, Brittany!

Singleness

One of my favorite topics to write about is singleness, because I’ve been single for the better part of 3 1/2 years and have recently started really enjoying it. However, I have several friends who don’t share my positive attitude toward singleness, and I think that’s actually a shame. So I decided to list a couple of the ways I’ve found to make this time of being single something positive instead of something that makes me sad day after day.

-Stay busy. Really, this has helped me so much! For a couple of years I didn’t have very much going on, so I’d come home from work and sit on the couch and wallow in my singleness and let myself get really depressed. But then about a year ago I moved from Southern California back to the Central Coast of California and I’ve been so much busier since I moved! And since I’ve been busier I’ve had less and less time to be sad about being single.

Singleness

-Do something for you. Start a new workout routine, take a cooking class, work on your novel, make it a goal to watch all the episodes of The Office and Grey’s Anatomy. For me, it was a mix of blogging, co-ed softball, church activities, and a bunch of my friends moving back to this area the same time I did. There’s almost always something going on, and all of the activities I’m involved in are things that I’m doing for me, not because a boyfriend wanted to do them together.

-Get rid of anything that reminds you of your ex boyfriend(s). After I broke up with a serious boyfriend I kept all of our pictures, his letters, ticket stubs, even the sand from the beach where he first told me he loved me in a shoebox in my closet and I’d take it out from time to time and just be sad by myself. That was so unhealthy! I finally threw everything away, and since then I’ve felt a lot of closure. You might not need to get rid of everything, but definitely try not to surround yourself with love letters and play Adele for three hours straight.

And last but not least, surround yourself with great friends who will remind you constantly how great you are and how much you don’t need a man. Seriously, without my friends it would have been pretty impossible to embrace my singleness. But with the support of my real life friends and my friends on the web I’ve been able to see this time in my life as a gift and something to view with a positive attitude instead of wishing the days away until I meet the man of my dreams, and I hope you’re able to do the same!

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3 Comments

  • Reply
    Ashten
    August 6, 2013 at 8:46 am

    Juliette is one of my favorite bloggers! I’ve been single for 3 years. Can’t say I enjoy it all that much but this definitely helped me find a way to focus on the good!

  • Reply
    annieawiltse
    August 6, 2013 at 10:01 am

    Preach, J! I semi-dated a guy in college and all of what you recommended came together to help me move on from when it fell apart. Singleness is hard. But it’s also a season given to us, I think, at least in part, so we can focus on personal growth in Christ and learning elements of the sacrificial love we’ll be living out when the Lord brings a relationship and marriage to us.

  • Reply
    Chandler (The Free Spirit from Jersey)
    August 6, 2013 at 6:39 pm

    OMG I need to learn to look at more of the positives in being single (but I still really want a boyfriend)… anyway I love Juliette’s blog and this post is pretty much perfect!

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